Restored Joy
A Precious Gift
Listen:
I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete (John 15:11, NIV).
Reflect:
As a child I was rebellious and always in trouble. For example, I’d stamp my feet, refusing to help with the dishes. A few times my mother sent me to stand in the corner, and I defiantly spit at the wall. Every day my mother had to discipline me, sometimes multiple times. All my efforts to try to be “good” failed, which served to convince me at an early age that I was, without a doubt, a sinner.
When I was ten years old, our family went to a Billy Graham Crusade, and I went forward at the altar call. That night I lay awake for a long time, marveling with happiness that Jesus really lived in my heart now. That he really erased all my sins. That he really forgave me. Me, the incorrigible kid.
I grew up and matured as a believer. Then a few years ago, I lost my joy in the Lord for an extended period. I felt distant from God, and this caused a lot of anguish. I became more and more troubled and began to feel as if something was choking the life out of me. “Lord, please show me what’s wrong!” I begged.
He pointed to the lies I was telling myself: You’re wearing God out. He won’t keep forgiving you for the same old things. You should be farther along as a Christian by now. Especially at this “grandmotherly” age!
No wonder I could find no joy or relief after confessing my sins. I believed I had overshot the limit for repeat failures!
Why such doubt and unbelief? The cause of my joylessness was painful to realize—I had fixated on me, not the Lord. On my efforts, not his. I had returned to my childhood pattern of always trying harder when I failed. Let me tell you, Me-Myself-and-I is a terrible abyss to fall into.
I resolved to turn away from “me” and look only at him. When once again I allowed myself to revel in his love and his joy-giving grace, my peace returned.
How true it is that basic lessons often need to be relearned. Praise God that Christ’s blood covers all our sins: past, present, and future. Amen and Amen!
Prayer:
Lord, we rejoice that we can live in an unimpeded and unsullied relationship with you because of your shed blood, not because of our performance. And thank you that when we wander around like confused, forgetful sheep, you gently lead us back to our senses. In Jesus’ name.
Breath prayer:
Inhale: Jesus’ happiness
Exhale: is in me.
Questions:
Have you ever experienced a season when you’ve doubted God?
What thinking errors led to your doubt or may affect you even now?
Condensed version was published by Lifesprings International, July 1, 2025.
You are not alone. How many times do I say, "How can I be this old and I haven't learnt this or that?" It's a never-ending story, isn't it? But thank God it's not about us but Him!! Thanks for your transparency, Ruth!
Your posts are always so encouraging thank you Ruth.